Huh?!

Things I do not understand...and its only 5 days into the new year. Its going to be a long year!
Target - I was in the store on January 2nd and what do they have out all ready...to my dismay: SWIMSUITS. Did I miss something...as I froze my booty off in the 40 degree weather walking into the store? Those swimsuits are going to be there for the next 9 months. And what is with the employees having more holes in their faces than a piece of Swiss cheese? Are they THAT hard up for cashiers that they have to hire people with ther personality of a rock, hair sticking up about a foot off their heads...and about 10 piercings in their pale faces?!
Trash Can - Its the second day of the year.....trash day! We are a trash loving family---so we produce a lot of trash. For this reason we have (or had) 2 trash cans that we put out on trash day. The trash truck comes and goes and its time to bring the cans in-----but there is only one trash can. Someone stole one of our trash cans. I guess they figured we had one to spare and didn't need the extra recepticle---that we pay $65 bucks for each year! Oh well, if its a neighbor we will get even by putting all of our extra trash in each of their cans really late the night before trash day.
Rocking Chair - Luke is out on our porch this weekend and he realizes that one of our rocking chairs is missing from the porch. Again, since we had two others did the thief think we had one to spare?! When we moved into the house 4 years ago we purchased three nice, black rocking chairs for the porch. One of my husband's friends, who lives downtown, always said we were crazy because they were going to get stolen. We thought he was crazy because we live far from the ghetto. I was obviously mistaken. I just keep hoping its a big joke....and its going to reappear on our porch one day.
Our Bank - Our banking institution can apply fees quicker than Tubbs can sniff out M&M's. BUT---when an electronic check is processed for $39.95 it takes them over a week to tell me who the payee is. Are you serious?
MTV True Life -Its Saturday, my boys are playing quietly in their room and I am lounging on the couch. I flip through the TV channels and regrettably I end up watching this show called "Camp'd Out: I'm Going to Snowboarding Camp." I want to know which parent in their right mind would send their teenage son or daughter to this co-ed "summer camp" where the counselors appear to have the mentalities of jr. highers and look about as old. I am wondering if the parents just needed to get rid of their kids for 2-3 weeks. It was absolutely amazing and left me in awe.
Church - We are living proof that no matter what time church starts we will be late. I was just heckling Sister Perry on Saturday telling her that she better be on time. Well, this proved no easy task for us on Sunday morning, even when church now starts at 12:30pm. We woke up around 8:45 and had breakfast. (No we didn't fast....long story for another time, but just consider us heathens) After breakfast Luke suggests I lay down and relax....so I jump at the chance. Next thing I know I am waking up at 11:45. Ahhhhh....! Its a wonder we got to Sacrament before the Sacrament was passed. But we did it. (And Sister Perry I can imagine your look of glee as you saw the four of us walk in AFTER your clan! J/K! :) Yes---we are pathetic.
My Boys - They couldn't wait to get for vacation to end. About a week into Christmas break Tubbs began asking me everyday if there was school tomorrow. When I told him no he was disappointed. Seriously?! Am I really so terrible to be around for 16 consecutive days that they would rather be at school?! They will rue the day that they desired school over being home with mama!